I am not an Oprah person. I've never watched her show, I don't buy her magazine, etc. But I just read her Spring 2000 interview with Camille Cosby start to finish and it was one of the best interviews I've ever read. I finished it and then I started again. And I know I will read it again. There were many passages that moved me, not least of all her discussion about her marriage to Bill early on and how they made a choice (after about 10 years together) to really be together and work on their relationship. She also talks about how she navigated the pain and grief in the year following the murder of her son, Ennis. And then there is this wonderful passage on aging, which makes me want to be 40 right now!
Oprah: I was in your kitchen once, whining to you and Bill about handling fame. I had the disease to please, and you said to me, "Honey, just wait until you're 40. All of this will change. You will let it all go. It will not be a threat to you anymore." How did you know that?
Camille: At 40 you become more self-assured. You realize that men don't look at you as a toy any longer; they don't flirt in the same way. And if they flirt, it is because you are really looking good. It's the real deal. Everything becomes real after 40. I'm now in my fifties, and my tolerance level for nonsense is zero. I know I'm going to be something else when I'm 60.
Oprah: So your tolerance for nonsense disappears?
Camille: Zero.
Oprah: And the need to please others?
Camille: Out the window. You realize it is a waste of your time, because the older we become, the busier we become. We become busier with things we really love to do rather than being busy with other people's stuff.
3 comments:
What a beautiful sentiment - I wish I could be 40 too (except with all the perkiness of youth). I'm still at the 'pleasing non-specific people who expect me to be A, B or C' stage and it's frustrating because maybe I just want to an F or a J or something - I don't know yet! Still, I think in the past four years I've started on that journey to 'being busy with things I really love'.
I love it! "We become busier with things we really love to do rather than being busy with other people's stuff." Advice to take to heart now!
Thanks so much for sharing this.
LC from the world of ellesee
Ohhhh that sounds divine. All the more tantalizing because it feels almost, but almost, within reach. I can feel the no-nonsense coming out already. Yeah, that's right, back up with those cat calls -- I'mma smack you upside!! ...Er, maybe that's not entirely what Oprah meant.... :P xoxoxo
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